Mission VI: Bakunin – Could it be, we’re after the real plot!?

Well unfortunately for this mission due to some last minute schedule changes we had a much smaller crew than usual. We started with players for Tkazi the Maya star/enforcer of some sort and Sayid the murderous and cloaked assassin. Part way into the mission PC for Kirk Lazarus arrived as well. We still have a couple players that just couldn’t make it last minute: Kotsya the uberhacker, Shadow the devil dog (he came on later, but we had a lot of trouble getting the online connection working), and Executive Noodles the VP of a major sphere firm and lover of Lo Pan’s Noodle Hut. Now officially Executive Noodles (not his real name, but it’s real close to sticking) hasn’t joined the team, but he knows of their existence from their encounter during the motorcycle race. So I mostly played as XO Noodles, and hopefully I pushed his character in a direction the PC is okay with. If not…it was someone else the whoooooole time! 😀

So when last we joined our…morally ambiguous associates, they had just successfully escaped the motorcycle race where the authorities, including a significant contingent of RIOT GRRLs as well as a moderator assault/policing craft, had broken up the festivities after the multiple homicides.


The team had purchased some equipment, including a heavy surgical enhancement for Sayid which left him completely out of money and in debt to some of the wrong people…and also wounded from the surgical procedure. Poor Ken the space dandy had stormed off after the race when he learned his friend had been killed, and the rest of the team geared up to assault the vault!

As mentioned previously the team decided to do this deed on the memorial day for the formation of the Moderator core. A day that commemorates the 100 dead in the worst tragedy aboard Bakunin. However while the moderator core commemorates their fallen and awards those of exemplary service, protestors frequently form outside, as not everyone’s happy that the moderators try to protect the social energy of Bakunin.

Casing the joint in the morning they find the crowds of supporters and protestors gathering the commons area beside the bank vault. They also notice Wislaw Pelc, Executive Noodleman, and five cloaked/trenchcoated figures that walk strangely heading into the building. Executive noodles had his standard box of noodles in hand for breakfast.

They start by managing to edit and fabricate Tkazi’s close up footage of the street race, implicating Moderators as taking the first shot! Tkazi creates an additional narration with some scripting help from Sayid to make it appear overwhelming evidence and they distribute it to Arachne. A wave of shock and horror pass through the crowd of protestors as their message pops up on each person’s AR. The moderators!? It was them the whole time! As the crowd starts to build in noise (and possibly violence), the team slips into the banks reception area completely undetected…


Except for Tkazi…who tries to sneak into the door when one of the receptionists asks in a cheery voice, ‘Hi sir! That’s a bit of a strange way to walk into a bank! How can we help today?’ Then the team detonates their pre planted explosive in the hallway! (see mission…uh…IV I think?) The guards are distracted and Tkazi tries to persuade them to go outside and see what’s going on. Tkazi does not persuade them even a little bit, and they try to muscle him out the door.

Meanwhile Sayid’s gotten into position and with his grazeblade attacks the nearest receptionist dealing him a killing blow immediately. He then takes a second attack at the second receptionist. She’s badly wounded, but still in this fight! Meanwhile across the room Tkazi attempts to swing one of the Corporate Security guys around and fire through him, but his AP spitfire snags and he misses the shot!

The security team suddenly alerted to the violence, spends some heat to do some attacks! The receptionist lashes out first slicing into Sayid’s leg, but not doing much damage. The CorSec behind sayid fires wildly with his combirifle and misses.

I will admit I lost a bit of track of the fight and if the other CorSec’s managed to do any damage or if I got things in exactly the right order, but after their turn, Kirk Lazarus joins the fray and as the CorSec brings up his rifle to defend, he fumbles it completely just kind of tossing it to Kirk. Kirk then summarily slices him in two. Shadow stabs out and just barely grazes the corsec.

Then it’s on to round two, sadly the second receptionist bleeds out from the toxic damage dealt by Sayid. Tkazi then spitfires one CorSec taking him out of the fight. Shadow swings up against the last CorSec and his blade comes out of the hilt embedding itself in the ceiling going poioioioiiiiing. He then chucks the hilt at the guy who’s vaguely annoyed. If I remember correctly, Kirk then comes up and slashes into the poor man and he’s gone.


The vault elevator is in front of them. They have access and Tkazi manages to find an additional access key on the guard. After some deliberation and verifying that they haven’t set off any alarms (thanks much to Kotsya disabling the security systems). They head down to the vault Tkazi’s centered in the doorway on a crouch with his rifle out. Kirk’s behind him sayid’s faded into the background, shadow’s to one side using the side wall as cover.


The team is facing the wrong way as the door opens and when they turn they come face to face with xo noodles wislaw and 5 cloaks

Executive noodles proceeds to order them with substantial success to not shoot and come forward as they have something to discuss. Kirk as team representative is brutally punched in his souls guts and takes a metanoia wound. He’s currently wetting his pants (PCs choice, I didn’t make him. 😀 )

A back and forth occurs with the team. Sayid admits they’re here because they’ve heard of some fooling with Aristeia matches and they’ve come to find evidence. As the conversation goes on it becomes clear that the team knows basically nothing, and noodles (while gesturing with his chopsticks) is increasingly threatening some brutal interrogation methods. Kirk after telling everything he knew about the job to executive noodles (summary: They said I could chop stuff here, so I came to chop stuff…), the very persuasive executive sent him to the elevator to think about what he’d done…where he collapsed in pile of tears in the fetal position.


Then the team gets an idea…and they send a message back to Kotsya…tell our employer we have opened the vault. Within seconds the elevator door closes and Kirk, in tears on the floor starts heading for the upper floor.

The team continue to negotiate with executive noodles. They tell him they can’t reveal the employer, it would be a breach of contract.

Ding! The elevator door opens, and kirk starts doing a belly crawl out the door, whispering in a cracking voice, ‘surviiiiiiive.’ However he’s stopped in his slow tracks and lifted by the belt back into the elevator. From his position Kirk see’s a pair of red and black boots as well as the mechanical legs of a remote.

The elevator door closes

Back in the floor below, executive noodles wants answers and gesticulates with his chopsticks that Wislaw may need to be interrogated, and believe me noodles has plenty of excellent interrogation methods… Tkazi volunteers the team to help! So kind Tkazi, always willing to help a friend or possible foe, just so long as helping is interrogating…


The elevator door opens and Kirk does a dive roll out of the way and hides behind shadow, and out steps the red and black costumed visage of SENOR MASSACRE!

That’s right folks the grand fighter of Aristeia (and this setting’s Dead Pool) has arrived!


“Hi Boys and Girls! Oh wow! There sure are a lot more of you than I expected! Thanks a whole lot for breaking into this vault for me! I was thinking about doing it, but then it sounded like a lot of work… Oh and this is my little pal Phil! Say hi Phil!”

A small red zondbot appears beside Senor Massacre, it’s painted with flowers and peace signs, and it lets loose a full burst from its total reaction heavy machine gun! Thankfully it’s a warning shot.

“Oh Phil! Mouth off like that again and you’ll have to go to your room. Now then. Just like we practiced, hop right up on this vault door. Super! Who’s a good boy. Who’s an adorable machinegun bot! It’s you Phil! That sure is a sexy little machine gun you’ve got. Now remember…the next person who opens this door just go ahead blow their god damn face off okay Phil?”

The room has gone to a stunned silence as the TR bot makes its way to the ceiling to set up an ambush, when Chief Executive Noodles says “Uhhh… Senor Massacre?! Is that really you?!”


Senor Massacre turns back. “OH! You’re all still here! Super!” He turns his head away “What are they still doing here?! They were supposed to loot the vault for their payment.” He turns back. “Well friends… I guess not friends exactly, but no one’s hired me to murder you today, so if you wouldn’t mind just taking your money and leaving that’d be just super”

The team taking the orders at absolute face value starts to head towards the safe deposit boxes surrounding the room. Kirk Lazarus continues combat rolling around the room for reasons known only to him.


Wislaw starts to shout, “Stop! No you cannot rob the vault! This is our…”

Dead Po…uh… Senor Massacre cuts him off, “Hmmm…oh this wasn’t about the vault…this is about prick that owns the vault, Borislaw Pelc, he’s your old man right? And a bit of payback that Phil and I owe him.”

“That’s right viewers… I mean tracking me down and breaking into my place, then tying me up and interrogating me… sure! That’s a Tuesday, and besides, daddy likes it rough. but… he… Sorry this is still pretty emotional for me… he knocked over my coffee maker and now the carafe has a crack in it! Can you… I mean… How… If you could see under this mask…just tears… real tears…” as he says this the team notices dark damp patches forming on Senor Massacre’s mask, “I mean how do you do that to another human being?! So I figured hire a bunch of goons,” he says waving at the team, “to break into his heavily fortified vault and leave him a lovely Heavy Machine Gun bot as a thank you card!” He pats Phil the TR bot gently on its chassis.


You see Borislaw and Wislaw had been attempting to fix Aristeia fights… and for Senor Massacre, it totally worked. He hasn’t shown up to the last three fights because of his broken coffee carafe, and the Pelc’s have been raking in the cash betting he’ll be a DNF. Tkazi makes a mental note to send Senor Massacre a brand new coffee pot and and carafe after this mission.

While everyone’s distracted by the supreme visage of Senor Massacre, the team, and Sayid in particular start cracking open deposit boxes, including one mentioned specifically, by Kotsya that contained a small data card, he also managed to loot 13 assets before all hell broke loose!

Executive noodles orders the hooded figures to attack Wislaw, but only two of the five do. The other three reveal themselves as a Chimera Uberfallkommando and two more Chimera’s to back her up. She immediately seizes the initiative and snaps her viral whip, wrapping it around Kirk’s head, before punching him, leaving him staggered and having taken a wound.


Tkazi then quickdraws his spitfire and savages the room, hitting one Chimera hard and with through and through damaging the Uberfall and the other chimera… and sadly the shop was closing, so we had to call it a bit early. Hopefully next round we’ll have more of a full crew and we can see how this brawl really turns out!

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